Um, hullo

I am alive, surviving. I exhausted my unemployment benefits and am still home wondering what the heck to do. I am on Facebook a lot, connecting with old friends, but mostly just picking up the house daily (after the kids wreck it). I am just blah, enjoying the weather and trying to make improvements. I will write more soon.

Unsolicited Baby Advice

I had a falling out with some very close friends 6 years ago. To say that I don't regret how things turned out would be a lie. I still miss their friendship and reached out a few years ago to see how it would go, and the door was politely closed, not slammed, for which I am thankful.

So while I was looking up a baby registry for a coworker in November, I stumbled upon a gift registry for one of those friends, S., and I took a chance and sent a very short but polite note to her parent's house (I didn't have a current address) along with a gift card for the baby and one for her to pamper herself. I received a nice thank you note. Door wasn't closed with this person, but I didn't take the opening to catch up and hopefully get together. I would need to mend 2 other bridges before I got to that point.

Anyway, while looking up another baby registry, this time for my cousin, I find out that J., the person I really hurt the most, is expecting. I am thrilled for her. She will be a great mother. But now I am stuck. Do I send her a gift as well, even though she closed the door? I don't want to stress her out, especially when being pregnant is not the best time to add to the emotions.

So in lieu of sending a long note (like the one I wanted to send S.) I will give my short list of mommy-to-be recommendations, because I have no other outlet to do so and hopefully, this will get it out of my system. Decision to send a gift will be made later.

Pregnancy:

1. Get a body pillow. Meet your new husband.
2. Get a prenatal massage as often as possible.
3. Keep up pedicures, preferably by someone else doing it.
4. Don't buy too many maternity clothes. Stick to the basics and check out the line at Target.
5. Have the boogie bag ready early.
6. Bring the boppy to the hospital for the delivery. It makes breastfeeding easier.
7. The maternity floor is nowhere near as great at L&D.
   
8. Get familiar with the breast pump.

Baby stuff:

1. Don't register for everything. The expensive bottles that you like might not be the ones junior likes.
2. Same goes for binkies.
3. Skip the diaper holder thingy.
4. Get the BEST glider/rocker/ottoman set that you can afford. You will be spending a lot of time in it.
5. DO get the bottle warmer. I still use mine as I never microwaved bottles or baby food for my kids.
6. Get a bottle sterilizer if you don't have a dishwasher.
7. DO get blanket sleepers (kids kick off blankets).
8. Don't bother with baby shoes until the kid is starting to walk. Get the leather booties (at an outlet or discount store)and progress from there.
9. GO TO THE OUTLETS AND TARGET! No reason to pay full price for stuff the kids will outgrow in nanoseconds. Both of my kids didn't even wear 9 month clothes.
10. Use Craigslist, Zwaggle and other site wisely for used stuff. Don't buy car seats or cribs used.
    
11. Don't expect to get your hair or body back right away.
12. Check out baby movies at a local theater. They allow babies and keep the sound lower, and no one cares if you happen to be breastfeeding in the middle of it.
13. Get a 529 account set up right away (and link a Upromise account to it). Start early saving for college!
14. If family members give you US Savings Bonds, have the bond made out to your name and SSN with the child as the beneficiary. This wont count again the child for financial aid for college.
15. Keep up with the baby book as often as possible. Print pictures as you can. Preserve memories as soon as you can. The first birthday will be here before you know it.
16. Don't save everything (like the umbilical stump). Be selective. Save the firsts, but don't get crazy. Too much clutter will make you nuts.
    
17. Get help for the first few weeks. You wont be yourself for a while.
18. Donate or sell stuff that you won't need as soon as you can. It will free up space and you can feel good about helping others.
19. Find a lullaby CD that you can stand to hear over and over again.
20. Realize that you cannot control everything and that people only mean well when they give unsolicited advice.
    

Rest In Peace

I am probably the 1 millionth person to comment on this, but, I cannot believe that Heath Ledger is gone. I cried, people, seriously welled up tears when I heard on the radio. I felt a pit in my stomach. I haven't felt this way about an actor who was gone too soon since River Phoenix. I am completely blown away. Maybe it was his deep voice and tortured soul roles that he played but man, I love his movies. He was a great talent and will be missed. What a shame.

Happy New Year!

Annaliese's first Christmas (above)


OK, I don't have a lot of time, I just stole a few moments before I have to pick up the kids.

1. Annaliese is walking at 9 months. Oh boy!
2. Miranda LOVES The Electric Company and tells me "Sorry. I can't hear you. There's a banana in my ear. " when she doesn't listen to me.
3. I am done with my work contract, home at the moment and looking for other work.
4. Honey is SUPER stressed, I hope that me being home now will lower his stress levels. I might even be able to get a hot dinner or two on the table when he gets home...
5. I went vegetarian and am taking yoga. Time for a better me.
6. Holidays were great. How were yours?

Halloween

Annaliese as Winnie the Pooh, Miranda as a Bumble Bee, Honey as a Hogwarts student, MM as the nice executioner, and AM as someone in a wig and cape. E. went as AMY WINEHOUSE! She looked awesome. I just dressed in black with a hot pink wig. It was great. Trick or treating in Sleepy Hollow country is the best!

Here is everyone.

Autumn

Pumpkins for my pun-kins.

Milestones

Wow. That last post was my 100th. On top of that, Annaliese is already crawling around everywhere and pulling herself to standing in the crib. Oh, and Miranda is WAY too smart for her own good. She is sneaky. Very sneaky. And she lies. Oh, and I don't like it. And honey and I just had our third wedding anniversary. You know what the traditional gift is for a third anniversary? Leather. The contemporary one? Crystal. Our anniversary? Was us in bed asleep by 10pm, too exhausted from one terrible work week after another. He still wants to give the leather gift. I told him to make sure that it was tied to a crystal that I could hang in the window. You know me, very feng shui.

Anyhoo. I am working like a dog tonight. Too many things going on. I am HOPING that he isn't going too crazy with the two little ones on his own without E.'s help.

Just as an aside, I have been noticing that I have not really been taking stock in appreciating things lately. I have just been living to work, getting glimpses of life in watching the kids grow. Friendships have fallen by the wayside, love life is sparse, and "renewing my spirit" so to speak, is not very "renewed". I have fallen into quite a rut. I am trying to break out, live a little until the end of my work contract, and then hopefully breathe easier when it is over and the holidays are complete. My kids are getting a little more than the bare minimum of me, but then I am exhausted. And the headaches continue. Now it is definitely my sinuses. I hope I don't get the flu. I am getting a flu shot next week.

I have been trying to expand my horizons, learn more applications on the computer, appreciate art, take more pictures. I am excited about the possibility of changing industries from pharmaceutical into sports business. I really think that it would be just as stable as pharma, and the scheduling is much more concrete. That would be great. The hours are probably still hell, but at least it would be predictable.

As for "renewing my spirit", I have always been a great lover of art, 20th century modern furniture, early 20th century architecture (Frank Lloyd Wright) and sculpture (Calder), contempory abstract paintings (Rothko), photography (just learning), and glasswork (Dale Chihuly), with a few Greek statues and Medieval art and architecture thrown in the mix. For performing art, I will always go back to the ballet. I get my tickets for the Nutcracker at Lincoln Center in July. Puppetry is next (my love of anything Julie Taymor has trickled down to Miranda watching The Magic Flute with wide-eyed wonder), and then movies with an edge and old choral music (Mozart's Requiem and Handel's Messiah are my faves). For classical music, Bach is my absolute favorite. For our wedding, I had only Bach pieces playing for the procession and recession. I love Sudoku.

I hope to carve out some time soon to take Miranda to Storm King. I think she would love the monumental sculpture pieces and it is beautiful in the fall. I agree that kids under 4 shouldn't be allowed at Lincoln Center. She won't appreciate it. And I want to enjoy myself. Not have the back of my chair kicked 100 times with whining.

I also am an observist. I catch the misspelled words on billboards, signs, etc, all the time. I LOVE when Jay Leno has his bit with the newspapers. I have seen bouquet, Caesar, and field spelled incorrectly more times than I can count. I also appreciate witty literary quips, like "sarchasm" and "does anal retentive have a hyphen?" or "Vivant Linguae Mortuae".
I notice the wierdest stuff. Like the guy jacking off at the LIRR as it went by his "office" (if he was working in the back of an office building, naked) at 7am.

I need to say goodnight to the old lady whispering hush and break out into something enriching. But then again, that book puts Miranda out 75% of the time. So maybe it is a good thing.

I am not a luddite, but c'mon...

Last night E. stated that she absolutely needed to use the only working computer in the house (that is connected to the flat screen tv) in order to complete her English homework.

Me: what are you looking up online?
E.: I have to look up words on Dictionary.com.
Me: Vocabulary words? Are you looking up definitions or anything more specific?
E.: Definitions. Can I puh-leeze sign on? I need to get this done.
Me: Can you use a dictionary? Look them up in the book?
E.: (getting upset) Huh? I have to look them up! Why can't I use the computer?
Me: Why can't you use a book?
E.: It won't have what is online.
Me: They get the information from what is in the book, silly.
E.: (exasperated) OK. Fine. But why can't I use the computer?

Wow. How far students have come to get information on demand.

Memes are fun

This is from Run with the Fishes...

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car) - Cheetah Quest

2.YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (fave ice cream flavor, favorite cookie) - Cheesecake Milano

3. YOUR “FLY Guy/Girl” NAME: (first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name) - M Mos

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal) - Sage Wolf (HAH!)

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born) - Patti Islip

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first) - Mosmi

7. SUPERHERO NAME: (”The” + 2nd favorite color, favorite drink) - The Periwinkle Perrier

8. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers) - Cornelius Karl (hehe)

9. STRIPPER NAME: ( the name of your favorite perfume/cologne/scent, favorite candy) - Mademoiselle Amedei

10.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names ) - Helen Robert

11. TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter) - Trafton Tempe

12. SPY NAME/BOND GIRL: (your favorite season/holiday, flower) - Autumn Calla

13. CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now + “ie” or “y”) - Pumpkin Pajammy

14. HIPPY NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree) - Waffle Japanese Maple

15. YOUR ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME: (”The” + Your fave hobby/craft, fave weather element + “Tour”) - The Websurfing Lightning Tour (how about the only hobby I really do anymore, my scrapbooking stuff is collecting dust)

Mother of the Year! (Not)

Last Saturday was Miranda's first trip to the emergency room. Hopefully, her last.

I was folding laundry in my bedroom while both girls were napping. I heard Miranda walking through the kitchen, sniffling, and yelling for me to come as she was all wet. When I finally saw her, her shirt was soaked. And smelled like alcohol. And mint. Then it hit me.

She drank rubbing alcohol.

I had the alcohol out as I used it earlier to sterilize the rectal thermometer used to check the baby's temperature. I capped it, left it out and told myself, "Don't forget to put that away before Miranda wakes up". Well, I didn't hear her get up. I should have put it away right then.

I smelled her mouth to check her breath. Oh, yes. She definitely had it in her mouth. Whether she swallowed it or not, I didn't know. She likes the smell of the hand sanitizer and I have learned to keep that out of reach for fear of her licking it off her skin.

I called 911 to get the number for poison control. 911 connected me to the local ambulance. Then I had 2 EMTs and 2 police officers in my house, admiring the view, not helping me get the kids out the door. I thought they sent the cops to give her a breathalizer. Um, no. They just stood there. They did stop traffic so that we could get the ambulance on its way.

So there I am, Miranda on my lap on a gurney, riding backwards in the ambulance, the baby in her car seat strapped into the jump seat in the rear. Honey was out with E. shopping not too far away, and they would meet us at the ER.

The ER nurse and doc were in love with her the minute she started dancing on the gurney, singing "where is thumbkin". Miranda's love for them turned nasty when I had to hold her and they drew her blood from the vein in the back of her hand.

The good thing is that her blood alcohol level and CBC were fine. The bad thing was that we had to sit in the ER holding room for another 2.5 hrs for observation before she could be released. She then continued to dance and sing for them, entertain an elderly woman who was pretty much comatose, and a baby getting a nebulizer treatment. After 2 hours, they gave her apple juice and graham crackers. Then she had the runs. Badly. And it was green. From the coloring in the alcohol. Bizarre.

So, I sometimes fear that ACS is going to take my kids away. But then, it was a really dumb mistake. It could have happened to anyone. Right?

How Bizarre

I sign onto myspace occasionally with my honey's sign-in (as I don't have an account) to kick my cousin's butt to write to me and in following a link here and a "friend" there, I find out that my ex-fiance is now running big corporate events in NYC. How weird that we would wind up in the same business? Or that I would totally love to run the high-profile events that his company runs and get out of pharmaceutical events/meetings? That would be just too weird, you think?

Another Meme, cuz I am a loser...

and I like to see what other people put down. This is from Much More Than A Mom and my cuz, Robyn.

LAYER ONE:
– Name: Yes, I have 5 in total. First, middle, confirmation, maiden, and married.
– Birth date: November 30
– Birthplace: Long Island, NY
– Current Location: Yonkers, NY
– Eye Color: Light Brown
– Hair Color: Nice and Easy Natural Dark Auburn
– Height: 5' 6.5" (I need that extra half inch! I am the shortest in my family!)
– Righty or Lefty: Righty
– Zodiac Sign: A very typical Sagittarius. By the book, or stars, or whatever. It fits.
–Religion: A challenging Catholic

LAYER TWO:
– Your heritage: German and English-Irish-Scottish. I work like a German and have the Irish pale skin and freckles. Oh, and I used to drink like a fish. I think that is Irish part too.
– The shoes you wore today: Olive Green Beach Trekker Sneakers from Land's End. LOVE THEM!
– Your weakness: Chocolate. Nice days. Kryptonite.
– Your fears: That my kids will grow up to be spoiled brats with no sense of philanthropy.
– Your perfect pizza: Little Italy Pizza Neapolitan on 43rd St. between Madison and 5th Aves.
– Goal you’d like to achieve: Getting my CMP. Being the best mom and wife. Getting back to college weight.

LAYER THREE:
– Your most overused phrase on AIM: Don’t use AIM.
– Your first waking thoughts: Snooze. Must hit snooze. Annaliese is usually my alarm clock, so out the window for snoozing.
- Your best physical feature: Eyes and brain (if you could see it, it is damn sexy).
– Your most missed memory: Manicures.

LAYER FOUR:
– Pepsi or Coke: Dr. Pepper if I drink soda at all. Not diet, regular. Diet has an aftertaste (even though they advertise that it doesn't).
– McDonald’s or Burger King: Wendy's.
– Single or group dates: Who has time? And single if I had to choose.
– Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton. Black. No sugar. No lemon. Lots of ice. Preferably sun-brewed. Always Lipton. My grandmother would roll over in her grave if I had Nestea.
– Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate, see weakness. The darker, the better.
– Cappuccino or coffee: Cinnamon Hazelnut Coffee with fat-free half n half and 2 splenda, please.

LAYER FIVE:
– Cuss: Sometimes.
– Smoke: Quit years ago.
– Sing: Only to the kids now. And it is usually The Itsy Bitsy Spider or ABC's
– Take a shower everyday: Every other. I don't stink and I have an infant and toddler and little time.
– Do you think you’ve been in love: Yep!
– Want to go to college: Done with it. I think I remember it. It is kinda hazy...
- Liked high school: Went to 2 very different ones. I didn't appreciate school at the time. I hated classes but like the socializing. I still was a B student without trying very hard.
– Want to get married: Did that.
– Believe in yourself: Getting my bachelor's degree was the single most self-gratifying moment in my life. I did it all by myself and I reached my goal.
– Get motion sickness: Lately, those roller coasters that I loved are way out of my league. Hell, the teacups and swings are starting to make me nervous. I can still read in the car backwards with no issues (thank goodness!)
– Think you’re attractive: Who am I gonna attract with 2 kids and a husband? My husband still thinks I am, that is all that matters to me.
– Think you’re a health freak: I know what I am supposed to do....
– Get along with your parent(s): Yes, especially now that I don't live with them.
– Like thunderstorms: Love watching them roll over the Palisades, over the Hudson and over my house. I don't like it when my dog starts freaking out...
– Play an instrument: Used to play flute, can read music, VERY basic piano, and I used to sing in choirs.

LAYER SIX: In the past month…
– Drank alcohol: no
– Smoked: no
– Done a drug: Does lots of Excedrin count? I get headaches.
– Made Out: Not in a while. My husband complained about that just last night.
– Gone on a date: I schedule them for every Friday night. If I actually planned on what to do, that would be something.
– Gone to the mall?: Oh god, yes, unfortunately. See previous post.
- Eaten an entire box of Oreos?: No, but brownies? Yes. See post about the mall.
– Eaten sushi: No! And I want sushimi right now!
– Been on stage: No.
– Been dumped: No.
– Gone skating: Plan on it for this fall.
– Made homemade cookies: Brownies. See Oreo cookie question.
– Dyed your hair: See section one regarding hair color.
– Stolen Anything: No way.

LAYER SEVEN: Ever…
– Played a game that required removal of clothing: Yes, strip poker. I was in college, had a hot bod, was drinking with friends, and I won, I think.
–If so, was it mixed company: yes
– Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: I went to the #1 party school in the 90's as ranked by Playboy. Duh. What do you think?
– Been caught “doing something”: Yes, in the parking lot at an Islander game many years ago. I don't remember the game...cops got an eyeful.
– Been called a tease: Yes, I was. It was wrong. I should never have gotten myself into those situations before I was ready.
– Gotten beaten up: Yes, elementary school sucked.
– Shoplifted: No.
– Changed who you were to fit in: A little.

LAYER EIGHT:
– Age you hope to be married: I was 34. I didn't have an ideal age.
– Numbers and Names of Children: Miranda Rose-2 yrs, Annaliese Evangeline-5 months
– Describe your Dream Wedding: Well, mine was pretty much what I imagined-I had a budget.
– How do you want to die: In my sleep, no pain, with a happily fulfilled life.
– Where you want to go to college: Done with that. NYU for continuing ed classes.
– What do you want to be when you grow up: Able to support my family on the oodles of interest from my trust and not work.
– What country would you most like to visit: Continents is more like it. Africa and Europe. I have been to Scandinavia and The British Isles, but not the continent properly.

LAYER NINE:– Number of drugs taken illegally: 1. Pot. In college. A long time ago.
– Number of people I could trust with my life: 3.
– Number of CDs that I own: Maybe 25. MP3's? Maybe 100. I listen to the radio mostly.
– Number of piercings: 1 hole in each ear.
– Number of tattoos: 1 on shoulder. A Celtic wolf (really a lion I found out later) from The Book of Kells.
– Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper?: School paper? Maybe 5. Major paper, never.
– Number of scars on my body: around 4 (left palm, belly from where they removed my gall bladder)
– Number of things in my past that I regret: Too many. I wish I could say none. I wish my life would have taken me on a better path but with my family now.
–Current “cause” – Helping kids by donating box tops for education and campbell's soup labels to my niece's school, donating money to Oxfam and Doctors without Borders for Darfur and other African tragedy relief, and sponsoring students at College Pierre Toussaint in Haiti as well as donating my unused maternity clothes and baby items to a local women's home.
–Motto: I really need to get one of those motto things...

Revenge of the elipsis...

Miranda says the funniest shit out of the blue.

I was waiting for a parking spot at the food store and some yahoo cut in ahead of me (minivans don't maneuver too quickly) and stole the spot. Well, I cursed him and yelled and the driver just threw up his hands and trotted away. Just then Miranda said very sweetly, "Mommy... fuck it". I lost it. It took every ounce of my being not to fall out of the van laughing. You know what? She was right. I got over it and found a better spot anyway.

We were at the pediatrician's office for a check-up and Miranda was still leery of doctors in white coats. While cowering in my arms, all of a sudden she looked up and saw the instruments on the wall for blood pressure and such, got a dose of courage and demanded "Doctor...look...my ears...NOW!". Both the doctor and I looked at each other and smiled. He said, "I guess I don't have ask how her speech is progressing...".

Miranda was sitting on the counter waiting for our order at the local hole-in-the-wall Chinese food take-out joint when she said rather loudly, "Mommy...PU...stinky..." then after watching the cooks in the kitchen she whispered, "Mommy...messy". Again, she was right. The food was terrible and it was the first and last time we were ever there.

At the Renaissance Fair, she danced a lot and at one point, when the music stopped while we were at the joust, she stopped dancing, looked around at the crowd, bowed and yelled "Thank you...thank you very much!"

And my favorite, for every little ow-ie and boo-boo, she says "mommy (sniff)..kiss it" and then after I make sure that I have covered the area with little kisses, she trots off to a new adventure...smiling.

Frustration and hilarity, in one post!

Myspace.com: I just don't get it. People mucking up their sites with bad music, busy wallpaper, and stupid surveys. I DO NOT have a page. Did I have to spell that out? It feels like the AOL of blogs...

Marble columns. I love this SNL skit. And Scarlett Johanssen is awesome in it. I am looking forward to seeing Nanny Diaries. I am actually reading the book first. It reminds me of some of the scenarios I encountered while a babysitter in Westhampton...

Gotta go get E. from school! Today was the first day!

Back at work...

The weekend came and went.

Friday--get home early-ish, pick up kids in Queens then drive through Yankee Game traffic to get home. Try to figure out what to do for weekend.

Saturday-Nothing special, cleaned as much as possible to have 2 days of less cleaning.

Sunday- Renaissance Faire in Tuxedo, NY. It was nice weather and the kids had a nice time. Little John fawned all over Annaliese and I ate a whole turkey leg without utensils (I didn't eat anything else)! Miranda danced to every piece of music she heard. Too cute.

Monday- Off to Palisades Mall on ridulously nice day to spend E.'s gift cards to get some clothes before school and have lunch with in-laws for MIL birthday. Ok, I am NEVER going to any of those little bippy clothing stores again. Delia's? $25 for a crappy, flimsy, cheap-ass t-shirt? Gimme a break. Hollister? Every pair of pants has their name strewn across the ass and the music was WAY too loud. I am not a prude. These stores are a complete rip-off. Not to mention, ever shop with a 'tween-ager? OMG. I only shop for clothes alone. Picky does not describe it. Not to mention, she was being picky about CRAPPY t-shirts. PFFFT. My advice? Shop online and return it at the store if it doesn't fit. And Cheesecake Factory with a baby and toddler? Who were we kidding. My poor MIL. I hope she made the most of it.

Oh, yeah, and I fell off the curb in the parking garage and dropped the baby. Yes, I dropped her. I wanted to throw up the whole way home. She is fine. Really. Just a little bump and scared a little, but OMG. I replay the fall in slow motion every time I close my eyes. It was a complete accident and everyone kept telling me that I was lucky that I didn't break my ankle (again). I held on to her as long as I could. The curb was extra-high and I was even aware of it and stepped extra-carefully so as not to fall, but there was a dip in the aspalt. Two minutes later, another women did the same thing (sans baby). I stayed awake all night and held the baby asleep in my arms and made sure she was breathing and comfortable the whole time. I am still in disbelief. I already called my MIL 3 times this AM to check on her.

So that was it. End of summer. No Montauk as we wanted (thank goodness my brother owns the place), no boat on a lake (Lake George scheduled for next year over July 4th!). I am looking forward to Apple Picking on October 6 with some friends and their kids upstate. Back to school!

Randomness

1. What happened to Stabbing Westward? I have "What Do I Have to Do" on my MP3 player (from Wither Blister Burn Peel) and they were awesome live when they opened for Depeche Mode at MSG in 1996.

2. I went back to work. Back at the place that let me go in May and I feel as if I just came back from maternity leave. Weird. It is temporary but I already have headaches from program complications. Welcome back me, o masochistic one.

3. How do you instill perspective, self-worth, ambition, and empathy in a 'tween-ager? Life is not over if your Abercrombie t-shirt is a little small from washing it or if you don't have a Coach bag. Also, everything is not obvious and laid out for you. Sometimes you have to dig a little for the answers. Put in some effort if you want something bad enough.

4. Miss South Carolina corrected her answer for the Miss Teen USA Pageant. I liked the first one better.

5. Why have I not seen Velvet Goldmine yet? It has Christian Bale, Ewan McGregor, AND Jonathan Rhys Meyers. I mean, hello! Love them ALL (for their acting skills and artistic choices of course).

6. Honey got me Amedei Chocolates, well, just because. (How sweet!) But then Miranda came running out of my room with a chocolate covered face and said "Mommy, yummy, chocolate"! How do not kill a toddler for eating the world's most expensive chocolate like it was a Hershey bar? Or do I just appreciate the fact that she has good taste and that we are starting her off with VERY high expectations? ACK.

Happy Birthday Miranda

Happy to you my little stinkerbell, streaker, all-around cutie-pie, and fellow chocolate lover.

How quickly you have grown from 6lbs 11oz to 29lbs of muscle...pure toddler. I love watching you discover new things like kayaks and butterflies to your love of clementines and the Finding Nemo "DVDV". You whisper "Mommy, I hear sound" when a truck goes by. You can imitate the sounds for many animals. You climb the monkey bars like a champ. You "fwing" and "fwim". You jump and skip, and hop. As you run away from me in the park you yell "Mommy, I FAST". You yell at your baby sister to WAKE UP and sneak into your big sister's bed in the morning to watch cartoons with her. You put on crocodile tears and whimper "no kiss, no hug" and push me away when you are determined to figure something out on your own. You call Opa on the phone just to say hi. You try to ride Boba and say "giddee-up". When you play pirates, you close one eye and say "arggh". You burst into songs all on your own with the Silly Hat song from Barney to The Beatles Love Me Do. You still count like King Arthur and everything is green and purple, but you know what is a number and what is a letter and what colors are. You LOVE fire trucks. You had a great time at Sesame Place for your birthday, and danced with Big Bird. You dance to any music. You are potty training very well. You call Annaliese "Anais" and both grandpa's "joe". You read the caterpillar book all by yourself and love to race through what he eats on Saturday. Then you yell "tummyache". You say goodnight to the old lady whispering "hush". You still have a binky and bottle, but not for long. After today, they are history.

My world is better with you in it, my little boo-boo. Happy second birthday.

Feeding Newborns

After reading numerous blogs and comments that came up after the decision by NYC Public Hospitals to pull formula samples, I cannot believe how off-topic most of the blogs and comments are, with everyone explaining their situations. Here is where I stand (in case you care).

1. The decision was made by a public assistance corporation that runs 11 hospitals and other community centers, NOT by all NY City or State hospitals.

2. The move is about MONEY, not to personally demonize the women using formula. That is what a lot of the breastfeeding advisors and advocates do. (Disclosure: my advisor at NYU did NOT make me feel guilty for not getting the hang of breastfeeding).

3. The decision does two things: takes away free samples from people on public assistance (ridiculous) and it will reduce the amount of private "unrestricted educational grant" money that the formula companies send to hospitals furthering the betterment of a hospital that could use the funds for enriching staff or updating infrastructure. (I can write another whole post on that).

4. People have posted that the formula companies are evil. I have not read the arguments for or against this. I do wish that formula companies would start to use dehydrated cow's milk from cows free from growth hormones and antibiotics to make formula. I feel that this would make a big difference. Similac just released an"Organic" formula that does this. I know that Good Start makes a "Natural Cultures" formula to help with digestion, but does not use organic milk. I do not use either at the moment, but will try the Similac Organic. Using organic milk to make infant formula should be standard and affordable. I wonder if there will be a clinical trial on precocious pubarche and organic formula. There should be! Sorry to go on a tangent here, but I will post this again.

EDIT: In researching organic formula further, there are other formula manufacturers than Similac, Enfamil, and GoodStart. The issue now is cost. And would the hospitals pull organic formula samples???

5. The main reason for pulling the samples is purely economic in nature-not for the formula companies but for public assistance. As public hospitals are located in poorer sections of the city and their patients usually rely on Medicaid and WIC for themselves and their children, the government doesn't want to pay for formula if it doesn't have to.

I take any samples and formula coupons for the ones I don't use and donate them to a women's home.

What is next, pulling the disposable diaper samples? That is another debate...

Six Things About Me...

1. I used to race sailboats. I just rediscovered my love for sailing virtually by watching Hard Water on Worldsport HD. I get to relive the knot in the pit of my stomach as the J22 class boats jockey their way for the starting line as well as rounding the mark just barely missing it. I can almost feel the water spraying up as I watch the crew lean over the sides. And the camera work and settings for every regatta are amazing. I only used to crew my aunt and uncle's boat at the Sayville Yacht Club in the Great South Bay on Long Island. But now living right on the Hudson River, I see sailboats (as well as freighters, tankers, The Circle Line, and garbage barges being towed by tug boats) every day. I kinda miss it. You can take the girl off the island, but I will never live far from water.

2. I used to horseback ride. Not formally, but often enough. There was a park by my house that had a stable and we used to ride there a lot (especially the horse named "Nanoo"). My neighbors had horses and they would take the kids from the block around. We also used to feed their chickens and goats. My cousin rode horses competitively and we would go with her until "Niblick" threw me off. And my best friend in high school had a horse that we would ride sometimes. So, it really wasn't a whole lot, but definitely more than a lot of people I know. As soon as the kids are able, I want to go again.

3. I ski black diamond trails. I started skiing when I was 12 at Scotch Valley (then it became Deer Run) in the Catskills. We then skied the rest of the Catskills and then Southern Vermont with my aunt and uncle who had a ski house in Londonderry. We loved Bromley and Stratton, Okemo, and Magic, in the winter and summer. In high school and college I was in the ski club and went to Mt Snow and Killington, Whiteface and Mad River Glen. I have skied all the mountains in the Poconos and the Berkshires. I still prefer Killington and Windham. I have never been to the Rockies. The best part was going with my aunt and uncle and 2 cousins every year the week between Christmas and New Years, never being awake to see the ball drop as we were to exhausted from a fun day. We have the best memories as we would have fun in a paper bag. The stories will be another post.

I started skiing again right before I got pregnant with Miranda. I hadnt gone in over 10 years and my honey insisted that I try snow boarding first. I did, and I hated it. So I stormed back inside the rental shack, switched to skis and felt like I never left. I cannot wait to go again this year and for Miranda to be old enough to go.

4. I wanted to be a dancer when I was little. I took all kinds of lessons right through 9th grade(ballet, tap, jazz, baton) and loved it. I still love to dance but there aren't any 30 and over clubs around and I would feel ridiculous with the little bippies shaking booty to some crap music.

5. I am a sucker for any movies that have elaborate costumes or interesting editing or are a musical. My favorite movies are action films.

6. I used to read 26 books a year when I had a 2+ hour commute. Now with an infant and toddler and no commute, I rarely have time and I miss it. I have to finish reading Thomas Cahill's Sailing The Wine-Dark Sea.

Dream #2 Fulfilled

When I was 13, a friend of mine had an extra ticket to see The Police on their Synchronicity tour at Madison Square Garden. I BEGGED my parents to let me go as I was already a full-fledged fan after hearing Zenyatta Mondatta in 1980. They would not budge citing that I was too young, yadda, yadda...all the things a 13 just doesn't want to hear. So, I didn't go.

After the show, they broke up.

Words cannot describe the saddness and disappointment that I felt.

Well, 24 years later, I FINALLY got to see Sting, Stewart, and Andy together again at Rentschler Field in Hartford, CT.

Again, words cannot describe how much emotion I felt. I actually teared up when they started the first song. I danced and sang along to almost every song (how can people sit down at shows? I just don't understand.). And I screamed my head off. I recorded Roxanne on my cell phone. It was awesome (but WHY did they play Walking in Your Footsteps?).

I don't have to see another concert as long as I live. I started in 1984 with Cindy Lauper (my cousin and I actually tried to DRESS like her, ick), MANY shows at Jones Beach (10,000 Maniacs, Sarah McLaughlin, Live, Stevie Nicks, Don Henley, Tina Turner, Powerstation, Arcadia, Heart, Wang Chung, Yes, Chicago...I can't even remember them all, some in lightning storms), then continued with The Eagles reunited, Pink Floyd at Yankee Stadium, The Who at Giants Stadium, The Fixx in Sag Harbor, The Grateful Dead at Highgate, Vermont right before Jerry died (pushing my car along to save gas in horrific traffic and driving thru CANADA to get home), experiencing both Woodstock '94 and '99 (that could be it's own post), Paul McCartney with my parents, The Allman Brothers (I only remember the first song after doing shots right before the show then ended with puking on my friend's shoes-does it still count?) Jimmy Page and Robert Plant, Billy Joel and Elton John (separate and together) , The Tragically Hip (three times) in small venues, Nine Inch Nails (Three times), Phish at Plattsburgh Air Force Base for Clifford Ball , U2 (twice), Sting every time he toured, Harry Connick Jr, Barry Manilow, Duran Duran reunited (dream #1) and others (I will not list the 80's hair bands). After over 100 shows, my concert career has come full circle.